Did Ja ever wonder about the stupid and trivial "crap", that people fight over? There once waz a pvt. club
in Beverly Hills, called "Pips" It was very exclusive because it was very expensive to join and their bylaws
stated upon a divorce, only one could keep the membership. During my lovely divorce proceedings,
where I had eight different attorneys, I sought custody of my three German Shepard Dogs and the
"Pips" card. I was awarded my dogs and was told their was a "Hit" on me, if I did not relinquish
my membership to "Pips"
Finally the great Judge, Harry Shaefer, flipped a coin and I won the Pips Membership.
Today, such a vital item would be placed on E-bay, 4 sell. Judge Shaefer would take his most
interesting divorce cases and sell them to various television networks. I got a call one night, to watch
on television, a movie of the week, called "Divorce Wars" I rolled over (like my dogs) laughing,
because a couple was fighting over custody of their three German Shepards. I was his-tearicle
because I was watching my divorce on NBC.
The one issue that was never fought over, was the custody of my son. My x-wife was awarded
custody and I had reasonable visitation rights. At least our insanity was never tested, for the sake
of my son.
Throughout this tormented ritual of divorce, my x only had one lawyer. Being an attorney and having
to rely on another attorney's advice, was knot something I was used to dealing with. That is why I had
eight different divorce lawyers. This included myself, who I fired because I was not doing a good job.
When I now think about the fighting over the "Pips" membership, I start to laugh over all the negative
energy involved in keeping that membership. What I lost track of, was in not fighting over my membership
in The Human Race. How little of us take that membership seriously.
This is one club, that doesn't cost to join, nor are their dues to pay.
So back to The Academy Awards Nominees, I would suggest that if James or Katherine win,
for best Directing, that they share this award with their x. After all, the sum total of their craft
was built from parts of both players. Joint custody ain't a bad idea, certainly less expensive
than attorney fees.
I am still Marshall Bitkower, a bit older, a bit wiser, a bit still edgy, but what the hell, we only
go around once. Perhaps our adversaries and x's, don't seem to know this.
By the way, I llok forward to Pres. Clinton and Pres. Bush, apearing on "Hung", the series.
One of them should be "Hung", from a tree, but he wouldn't know it and one should write a book,
about being a "Tiger", in the white House.
