"HEIDI FLEISS IS BACK ON TOP" OR ON THE BOTTOM"

HEIDI FLEISS'S MENWOIRS HAS BECOME A BEST SELLER ON THE NEW YORK TIME'S BEST SELLER'S LIST.
IT IS GOOD TO SEE HEIDI, " BACK ON TOP", AFTER ALL THE YEARS OF BEING ON THE "BOTTOM" HER BOOK
IS "NON-FRICTION", OF COURSE. THE CO-WRITTER IS MR.XXXX( YOU GOT TO UNDERSTAND HIS NAME)

I had an email from John Holme's Widow. She did not like my last column, said it was "too long" I didn't think anything
was" too long "for her. I know that "John" took her virginity from "Behind Her Green Door" Alright it's time for me to get
out of the gutter and start talking about our wonderful "United Nations" The U.N. deserves the Adolph Hitler Lifetime Award,
for inviting that look alike from "Down and Out, In Beverly Hills couture designer who dressed Nick Nolte to dress "up" as in
the same manner as Moammar Kidafi did dress today. Some how the term "War-drobe" seems befitting to Kadafi, which rhymes
with Kadaffy Duck ( A special Thank You, to Balfour Lax, for thinking of that)

Kadaffy thinks that the "Holocaust" never happened. Did he get his "alleged" education from the same people who loved
Francis Scott Keys second hit song( think about it) Perhaps this wittle "scmendrick" could consult with the DNA of Richard
Nixon, who stated, "I am not a liar", I'm just an ugly reminder of how wrong Dr. Frankenstein monster was, in trying to enter
the auditions for the new, "American Idle" Judge. This is not to be confused with, "American Idol". The former is to win the title
of the top American, who does not work.

I have been" herring" roomers that Esther Williams is coming out of retirement, to host, "Diving With The Starfish"( bada bing)
I've also been told that Francis Ford Coppola will be the host on the new show, not from Jerry Bruckheimer, called "Swimming
With The Fishess"

For those of you, who haven't heard yet, all convicted politicians, will be sent to "Lyin Country Safairy. The pretense is if you
stay their for two leap years, without being killed by a wild contributor, you will have earned Parole or a " GED" certificate.

MY NAME IS STILL MARSHALL BITKOWER and I must remind you, that there is no East Carolina or West Dakota or a
East or West Pole. Good day and God Bless.